Jennie's Story

I'm shaking and tired and scared. I had a secretive abortion over spring break. It was a surgical abortion of which I had the support of both my parents. However, two months later I am pregnant again despite taking an Emergency Contraceptive. This time I'm too embarrassed and ashamed to tell my parents. I thought I could handle it alone without the aid of the father and my parents but I'm not so sure...

I don't have time to think about the baby really..I'm taking two summer courses and working full-time...but I can't help but think about it as the date I made for my appointment draws near...It's Monday night and I am scheduled to go to the Planned Parenthood clinic Thursday morning... I don't have a car and I don't want to involve the father so I'm taking the bus... I'm missing class on Thursday. I only hope that I will be able to drag myself to my Statistics test Friday morning...Saturday I'm supposed to insert a suppository and I'm supposed to have cramps and nausea and bleeding..I must admit I'm not looking forward to this part...because, like the bus ride, I will go through this part alone...cloaked in shame and despair...alone in my dorm room...good thing I don't have a roommate...

I'm not sure what I will do...I guess I'll have to suck it up and put on a pad because I have work at 3...I'm most scared of the pain...and being alone...possibly bleeding to death...alone with out my parents knowing...my boyfriend at work....I also worry that my baby won't forgive me...that GOD won't forgive me...I've been reading lots of things about RU-486 on the web... oh well it's basically Tuesday now....I have a paper to write for class tomorrow... I'll try not to think about this anymore... I wonder if I will be able to go out Saturday evening...after I get off work..somehow I suspect that I won't....

Jennie
11 June 2001

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