Jessica's Story

I am 18 and have a 11-month-old daughter. I had her alone, her father does not want to be part of our lives. I met a man while I was pregnant and fell in love. He loves my daughter like his own.

He wanted a baby so bad, so I have just found out I was pregnant from him. But not soon enough, he just broke up with me. He thought I cheated on him, which I never have, so now he says he won't be with me. He wants this baby still and says to give it to him to care for when I have it.

But it's hard - how am I supposed to go through pregnancy alone depressed again. My daughter was born 3 weeks early at only 4 pounds, and they don't know why. I know, because I was sad and alone.

But this time I am worse because I love this guy and I feel sad to lose him over something I didn't do. I feel like I cannot go through this pregnancy, I am treating my daughter differently because I am so depressed. I feel in my heart I can't go through this again, yet I feel sorry for this baby because it's not this baby's fault. What should I do?????

Jessica
August 1998

 

TO JESSICA,

I cannot tell you what to do. I can encourage you to trust your own heart, your gut feeling, your inner voice...  Once you make a decision, believe in yourself for making the right decision for you.

See the "Pregnant? Need Help?" workbook designed for women or girls who are unsure. It covers all three choices--parenting, abortion, and adoption evenhandedly, and focuses on how you feel.

Watch out for fake abortion clinics offering free pregnancy tests.

Gain strength from other women by reading more stories in this website (click on "back").

National Abortion Federation offers some questions to consider if you are unsure about what to do.

more stories -- share your story

Birth Control Comparison - alll methods Abortion Info from Feminist Women's Health CenterShare your story
Poetry and Prose - by women about their reproductive lives Teens HealthResources for Women of Color
Feminist Abortion Clinics Real Life Abortion Stories from teens Questions and Answers

 

"What we didn't see was that we were all the same people we were before we came here and we brought the past, meaning the patriarchy, here with us. It will be a long and continuing process to purge ourselves of the culture we grew up in. Perhaps, it cannot even be done in our lifetime. Perhaps only our daughters, who will not learn the ways of men will be truly free."
- by Juana Maria Paz in 1980