Eils' Story

Numb!! i was numbed by the experience. i had an abortion 3 months ago and to this day i have never felt anything not a tear has passed my eye, but that's just me as i constantly cry for my friend who had one but i felt that i should have known better.

to this day i am waiting for my period and too scared to do a pregnancy test. i am too days late and thinking how could i have been so stupid. i have had sex twice since the first time and it looks like it could happen again.

the first time i was desperate to get rid of the baby i searched the net looking for things i could do or take to cause a miscarriage but in the end i realised that i had to have an abortion.

7 June 2001

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"If I had known what trouble you were bearing;
What griefs were in the silence of your face;
I would have been more gentle, and more caring,
And tried to give you gladness for a space."
— "If I Had Known" by Mary Carolyn Davies