Brandi's Story

I am 25 years old, a college junior, and engaged to be married on August 31, 2002. I read the stories of these women who have endured so much pain, and I thank the Heavens above that I am in the position that I am in today. I am a paralegal, earning a decent salary. My fiancee is a tax attorney. He is studying to take the Nevada bar now. I am going to law school next year. Life seemed to be finally coming together for me after many years of troubles. We found out about the baby 3 weeks ago. I was extremely tired and and not quite feeling myself. I was on the pill, so I didn't think twice. This was just a late period and it would be here soon. One day I was shopping at Wal Mart and fear of the unknown took over. I bought a pregnancy test and took it in the bathroom at Wal Mart. I could not believe my eyes: Positive. The two pink lines seemed to glare at me from their white background. My hands trembled and tears filled my eyes. I was not ready to be a mother.

I came from a very poor, uneducated family. My mother passed away last year and I despise my stepfather for the way he treated her. I decided long ago that I would lift myself and my older brother Bryan out of the oppressive hell we had grown up in. My stepfather is an extremely abusive man, addicted to drugs and alcohol. My mother was a strong woman that drowned in the codependency of her marriage. My brother Bryan now lives with me and is doing very well as an assistant executive chef. He is 30 and is only now just starting his life. My stepfather kicked him out after they nearly killed each other 2 years ago. It was the 5th time they have nearly killed each other (literally). None of this has come easily to me. I was married at 19 and divorced at 20 from an abusive, unfaithful man. I had another unsuccessful relationship after that and finally met my fiancee Jasen. It seems as if my whole life has been one struggle after another. It is merely by the grace of God that I have made it to where I am today. I bought a small house in November of last year, I was paying my own bills, taking care of my brother and healing emotionally after the death of my mother. Then in January, I met Jasen. My life changed entirely. Finally, I had someone in my life that I really wanted to share things with. We were engaged and moved into a larger house together. I never expected this, nor was I ready for it.

We discussed it briefly, but it was clear to me that Jasen was very excited to have this baby. I could see a smile on his face and tears in his eyes...tears of joy. I immediately dismissed any thought of abortion and we called his family. We were met with a little bit of apprehension, but for the most part it was good. Fears, all kinds of fears consumed me. Will I be a good mother? Will this sickness ever end? Will I ever have energy again? Will my relationship survive the birth of a child? Will this change us forever? I admit that I still considered abortion, but after researching it a little bit, I know that I could never let this gift from God be killed. There is now a child growing in my belly and I can't wait to meet him or her. We have discussed it. I am still going to law school. We are going to make it through this. My dreams and life are not over. We are going to have a little bebe and love it and be the best parents we can be. I realize now that we are in a far better situation than most and I am very thankful for that. Please consider all options before having an abortion. I am still very Pro Choice, but it is not a choice to be made lightly, or because someone else is forcing you. Good luck and my prayers are with all of you.

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