him in 93 when I was a senior in high school. I stole the number off his check
and called him. We met for dinner and started a relationship. A month into it
I found out I was pregnant. I didn't know what to do, I hadn't even graduated
yet. We started fighting about money, what to do, that sort of stuff. He wanted
me to keep it and I wasn't ready. I told my mother even though I knew she would
be mad and disappointed. She took me to have an abortion.
was very emotional afterwards. I cried a lot and had many emotional problems for
months. I left him and started a self destructive rampage. Then, I regained control of my life and started
to talk to him again. We started dating again and I definitely started using birth
We married in 1994. We had
our first daughter in Nov. of 1994. (a honeymoon baby). Our second was born in
April of 97. Although I was on birth control, which never worked for me well,
I recently delivered twins October 98. We love all our children and each other very much.
believe with all of my heart that if I would have had that first
baby we would have never gotten to get to know each other and the baby would have
had a horrible life being tossed between our families. I will always wonder, but
I can not regret because I have four healthy, happy children and a husband that
I know is who I was meant to be with. I think our relationship is stronger because
of the past we share together. He knows all the things I have done and I am hearing
more and more stories of his past everyday.
believe the choice I made was the best for us. I will never forget it as long
as I live, but I honestly believe that I would not have the children I love today.
That is how I get through my day.
choice is each individual person's to make. But I can say, you will never forget,
even when you have children in the future. Just believe what you must to get through
23 January 1999
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